3 ways to remain centered when you’re a busy mum

7:10pm – the alarm clock rings, you press the button “snooze” again …

7:35pm – you jump out of bed because you’re late! Yep…it’s Monday! You take a quick shower and go wake up your kids.

While they’re getting dressed, you go to get some milk because you realise that you’re out of it!

Océane is looking for her black trousers which are at the bottom of the basket of dirty clothes while Marine is not happy because she was supposed to get up early to study History before her test this morning!

Quick, it’s time to go, otherwise they’ll be late for school. 

With all of that, you didn’t even have time to get breakfast, not even a coffee …

After dropping the kids, you go to work, and as always, you get stuck in traffic… 

Once you finally get there, you open your PC to find that you already have 5 messages and 25 emails. It’s just the start of the day!

You have calls all day, a few appointments and 2 meetings. Fortunately there is coffee to keep you going!!!

You leave the office much later than expected and don’t have time to go to the gym. Pity, you would have loved to relax in the sauna after a good workout, but you have to go home to your kids.

All you’re thinking about is order a pizza and sit in front of a good movie with a glass of wine …

The girls are happy that you finally arrive to help them with their homework. They have so much to tell you, but as they talk to you, you’re thinking about some email that you forgot to reply to …

Your husband texts you that he will be home late.

It’s time to cook dinner and put a laundry on – and no, the day is not over yet!

9pm – your children are finally in bed!

9:30pm, your husband arrives and finds you asleep on the couch …

Does this sound like your life?

When you work and have children, it’s not always easy to balance a family life with a successful career. Even if you are an entrepreneur and you have more freedom, you often work a lot of hours, and it can be difficult to disconnect from work when you get home.

So, when you get back to your kids after a busy or stressful day, you are tired and have little patience with them when they ask for your attention.

You would love to be present and zen but instead are constantly thinking about your work, which is exhausting. 

I’m a mother of 2 girls of 12 and 13 years old. As you know, it’s a role with a lot of different tasks: 

  • ensure their basic needs (cooking, cleaning)
  • be involved in their education  (homework, school meetings …)
  • drive them to their activities (school, music or sports classes, parties …)
  • listen to their emotional needs

Not to mention having fun, shopping or inviting their friends …

While the girls are at school, I practice my activities of holistic therapist and virtual assistant. And as I’m self-employed,  I also do my own marketing, website and accounts.

As well as that, we have a holiday home that I look after (cleaning, bookings and marketing).

My husband is also self-employed and works 7 days a week for the best part of the year, so I’m the main carer for our girls.

That’s why I’ve set up 3 life habits that help me to be more relaxed with my girls so that I can make the most of the time I have with them (they grow up so fast) and be more efficient in my work.

(1) Self-care

This is really what will give you the energy you need to be the best parent you can be while being devoted to your career. This is key. The priority is YOU.

Here are some suggestions:

  • Eat healthy
  • Practice a sport – there are so many choices!
  • Get up one hour before the kids to have time for YOU
  • Meditate – even a few minutes
  • Take a break to read an inspiring article 
  • Write in your journal when you feel the need
  • Go to bed early to read in your bed
  • Do some yoga
  • Go to the SPA or get a treatment regularly
  • Dance on Meghan Trainor or Beyoncé !!!
  • Sing – even if you can’t
  • Learn to play an instrument
  • Draw, colour, paint or any another artistic activity
  • Go for a walk
  • Have lunch with a friend …

Every day, I do something for ME. Even if I only have 15 minutes, I take the time. I like getting up before everyone else, the house is calm and I can meditate. Afterwards, either I write in my diary, do a short workout or read an inspiring article / listen to a podcast while drinking my tea.

And you, what are you going to do just for yourself?

(2) Organisation

I organise myself and write everything, that way I avoid forgetting something !!! I am the queen of lists! And for that, I use 3 main tools:

  • A Diary
  • My Life Binder
  • An application on my phone: Evernote

First, my agenda … I’m a fan of inspiring diaries, those with quotes!

I note the girls classes, our sports activities, my appointments, the arrivals and departures of the holiday home and other important dates (school meetings for example). Once all written in the Diary, I can easily see how much free time I have left. That way, I can plan fun times with girls or important tasks to do.

In short, my Life Binder is where I have my printable planners to keep track of my habits, my finances and my ideas. I use it mainly for my work and my wellness.

In Evernote, I note:

  • All my ideas as they come in
  • The things I have to do – as I think about it
  • My shopping list – as soon as something is missing

So basically everything that goes through my head and I do not want to forget!

As my phone is my alarm clock (I leave it in airplane mode during the night), if I have an idea that goes through my head when I’m in bed, I can write it immediately so I don’t forget it the next day. And that way, I can go to sleep!

(3) Ask for help!

There is no shame asking for help for anything that you need: cleaning, cooking, minding your children while you take some me-time… get a housekeeper, a baby sitter or ask for help to your family, friends, partner or children – my girls do so much for me for the past 3/4 years, since the age of 8/9, they have helped me with some cleaning duties like washing up or hoovering and washing the floors, they always clean their own room (that’s one rule I have) and now Océane has even started cooking which is truly great help…

Remember, taking care of yourself is not selfish, it is essential to be able to take care of others. 

Download the weekly planner here to schedule some time for you each week.

Tissy